Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Dating Debacles!

You know, I was just thinking about this yesterday. I feel sorry for you "kids" with your whole "progressive" dating scene. I know you're not kids, but... Anyway, it seems like the dating culture now is full of people whose mantra is, "Oh, I'm not looking for a commitment?" WTF is up with all these commitment-phobes? I need to call some bullshit on that! Now, I can see males saying that and MEANING it! I can. And now they've got all the females saying it too! I'm here to let you know, if a girl EVER says that she is not looking for a relationship, SHE IS FULL OF SHIT! Colossally! Take that to the bank. Let me tell you something, my friend! Girls are not MADE that way! They are innately relational. Women need intimacy. We need meaningful connections, and don't believe any girl that tells you otherwise. You know why she's saying that? Because she is SADLY trying to change who she is to appear more appealing to a man who is not looking for a commitment, but just wants to wiggle his wiener in as many hoo hoos as he can. Girls are LINING UP to let boys wiggle their wieners in their hoo hoos, with the FALSE HOPE that SHE will be THE ONE who convinces him that intimacy WITH HER and a meaningful connection WITH HER will REALLY be what he wants! He just didn't KNOW IT until he met HER! I've never witnessed this amount of El Toro CaCa in my LIFE, and I can't figure out who I want to slap FIRST? The boys or the girls? It's a tough one!

If I were single right now, sitting across from some guy who has taken me out to dinner, I honestly can't imagine that I would sit there blowing smoke up his arse, postulating like I'm "not looking for a commitment..." I just think that people who are EVOLVED to any degree of maturity have come to the realization that the sun does not rise and set on THEM ALONE. The hedonistic pursuit of self-gratification and self-indulgence, nor the accumulation of things, stuff, possessions, etc. are really the way to leave one's mark on this earth. Being significant on this earth, strangely, is never accomplished alone, but REALLY through the collaborative efforts of people who LOVE EACH OTHER! And the most intimate bonds are those between lovers and those between a parent and child. Hmmm? Sounds like a family to ME! So why are people claiming NOT to want that? Why do people say, "Oh, I'm not the marrying type?" Bullshit. Everybody's the marrying type if they find the right person. And if said guy across the table from me claims that he's not looking for a relationship, GREAT! I couldn't be happier! I'll assume he's not "evolved" to any degree of maturity that I REQUIRE, and REGARDLESS of how "cute" he is (that one always aggravates me) or how much money he makes or what car he drives, his wiener is coming nowhere NEAR my hoo hoo, he is off my radar before he ever got ON, thanks for the steak. Why can't women do that? I'll tell you why. They're insecure. They don't know their value or their beauty or their significance on this earth. They don't know who they are. They believe they need a man to tell them who they are because, due to the absolute onslaught of lascivious grime the media feeds girls in this country, girls believe they must be defined by men. And people are going straight to hell over it, believe me! These girls need to wake up, put one hand on their hip, snap in "Z" formation, and LEARN HOW TO SAY THE F-WORD!

In a somewhat related arena, Sean-Martin and I have discussed in the past, which gender is most responsible for the world being what it is today, and we come at it from two different perspectives. He, being a man, claims that men are to blame for the ills of this world, and if men would just do "such and such", the world would be a much better place to live. I, being a woman, claim that women are to blame for the ills of this world, and if WOMEN would just do "such and such"... you get it.

Here's the "such and such". We both agree that the bottom line problem in this world are insecure people who, as I stated previously, don't know that they have such VALUE and BEAUTY and SIGNIFICANCE on this planet. Sean-Martin says that if every man simply cherished his FAMILY, protected them and provided for them, then collectively, men could rid the world of so many of its ills. Think about it. The best thing a man could do for his children is to love their mother, command respect for her by his example, provide an intact and stable home, teach his sons how to be men and do the same with their own families, cherish his daughters and teach them how to command respect for themselves, and let nature then takes its due course. Sean-Martin argues that men could change this world within one generation.

I don't disagree. I concur with Sean-Martin 100%. I just think women could fix the world, not in one generation, but in one WEEK if every woman would only live by this ONE RULE: "In light of the fact that I am VALUABLE, BEAUTIFUL, AND SIGNIFICANT, I will not ever allow ANY man to wiggle his wiener around in my hoo hoo unless he is ABSOLUTELY WORTHY!" Period! No exceptions. No excuses. Not negotiable. I am here to tell you, my friend, men would straighten up within DAYS, and the world would be fixed by TUESDAY!

What do you think?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Thank you Dear Abbey,
I agree with You but lean more to Sean Martin's position. Men should be the head of the house and that includes loving his wife "as Christ loves the Church" and providing his children of both gendures instruction and setting the proper example as a father. if Dad is on course, the family will follow as they have a standard bearer. Mom should provide love that only a Mother can give.